What to Look for In a Zombie Escape Vehicle

Today’s guest post is on a serious topic.  We all know that there’s a zombie apocalypse coming, right? Even the CDC has a page on zombie preparedness. Make sure you’re prepared by having the right zombie escape vehicle. ~ Miss Nessa

Having the right equipment for the right job can go a long ways. The same can be said for the vehicle you drive. If you are a forest ranger then a truck or SUV is for you. If you live in a downtown, urban area then you probably want something compact and fuel efficient.  In the inevitable zombie apocalypse, the vehicle you choose could save your life. Here are some things to keep in mind.

Obviously you are going to need something big and tough. You will need something that will have no problem plowing over a street a filled with zombies. You need something that won’t get torn arms and twisted legs caught up in the axels. An SUV is your best option.  You might think a truck would be useful as well, and is in terms of terrain, but an SUV has internal space that you can store supplies in without leaving the vehicle. If you have to get out of the cab to get something in the bed of the truck, you are leaving yourself exposed.

Not just any old SUV will do, however.  Ideally it needs to be a 4×4. That extra rear wheel drive can mean the difference between plowing through an old barricade and getting stuck on it. Just because it is large doesn’t mean it is the best though. If roads are filled with burned out and abandoned cars you might have to go cross country.  For instance, a Hummer has a lot of space, but it is also a gas guzzler. In a post-apocalyptic world, gas will be incredibly valuable and you will need as much as you can get. A hybrid SUV will probably be ideal.

You also want something with some options. Mount it on some large, off-road, durable tires that can roll over charred remains with ease.  Yeah, you might look like you are in a monster truck, but hey,  you are in a monster world now. Spare tires or Fix-A-Flat is also a must since you never know when you might hit a police road spike.

Good lighting can save your life. Don’t just settle for fog and running lights. Purchase a set of high powered auxiliary lights to mount on top of the vehicle to help spot those creepers in advance. A portable high beam is also useful for scoping out potential camp sites.

One of the most crucial pieces of equipment you can have is a winch.  Pulling cars away from blocking a bridge or a tree that has fallen over a road might save your life. You should consider putting on the back since you might need the front for a bulldozer blade or a ram.  A trailer hitch isn’t a bad idea either so you can pull some extra storage space.

A Ham radio and antenna can give you long-range communications. You can connect with other survivors or listen for the last remaining safe zones are. Some vehicles like Jeeps come with body armor and extra side plating, you might even want a snow plow for barricades.

Let’s be honest. Your odds of survival are pretty slim to begin with. The last thing you need is to have your car be the reason you don’t make for over a week.  Having the right vehicle equipped and ready to go may just give you the chance you need to survive.

Jefferson Jordan un-lives, un-breathes and shuffles his way through Southern California. He mainly writes about brains, automobiles, and survival.  He would write about romance and dating but sadly no one loves zombies.

Tags: zombies

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